adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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