I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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