I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize