so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
