Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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