Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
