im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
