please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
