im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize