we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
