Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
