Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
