Actions speak louder than pants.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
