If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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