I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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