sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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