guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
