She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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