I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize