the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
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Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
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I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Couch. On fire.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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