How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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