i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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