If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
