after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
