we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
