I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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