you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
