after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
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when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
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She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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