Where is the hickey?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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