hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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