We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
