I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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