She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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