How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
