By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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