i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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