it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
