I'm really into asian looking animals
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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