Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Is this like a preordered booty call?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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