You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize