so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
