I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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