Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize