He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
