Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Randomize
