thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
