what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
