You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
