Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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