I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize