so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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