The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
